Breastfeeding: My Story

Breastfeeding was (is) supposed to be a wonderful experience. "It's natural." "Babies are born to breastfeed." So many slogans are out there touting the simplicity and benefits. Yes, you sometimes hear horror stories of cracked and bleeding nipples or the dreaded "I didn't make enough milk," but overall, moms are told it will be an easy and convenient process.

What I've learned since having my son? It is anything but.

I planned on breastfeeding from the moment I saw those two lines. I knew the benefits and all of the basics. I mean, IT'S MY JOB to counsel expecting and new moms on breastfeeding. I read the books, I have the license (CLC), I knew it all.

Then my son was born. 8lbs 12oz of screaming, wonderful, joy.

He came out rooting!

His latch was beautiful. What a relief! I had no worries that breastfeeding was going to be anything but easy from then on. He clusterfed all night, which is what I was told is normal (and it is!). We discharged a little over 24hours after he was born.

At his peds appointment the next day, his weight had dropped to 7lbs 15oz. That's about 9%. 10% is considered concerning.

So I kept feeding over the weekend. Every 2.5-3 hours, we'd latch and "feed". On Monday, his weight was still 7lbs 15oz. I was crushed. His pediatrician, bless his heart, tried to be very optimistic and said, "Well he probably lost another ounce or two then gained it back, so that's good!" But he was still a little jaundiced and wasn't having enough output to clear the jaundice, so something had to be done.

Long story short, I started supplementing using and SNS (which I hated) to help J-man gain some weight. I also rented a hospital grade breast pump to help increase my supply. After three weeks of feeding on both sides, measuring supplement, recording intake, pumping, recording output (repeat), I was able to wean him from the supplement and "fully breastfeed."

Somehow, someway, by the grace of God, we breastfed until 10 months when he and I decided it was time to wean.

MILK DRUNK

Here's what I've learned:

Breastfeeding is hard work. Especially for first time breastfeeding moms. Its a learning process for both mom and baby. Just know there will probably be some difficulty in the beginning whether it be supply related (over- or under-), latch related, or baby just not cooperating. Until you both get the hang of it, and your supply regulates, it is anything but dandelions and daisies.

Supplementing is not a defeat. At the end of the day, we have to feed the baby. It doesn't matter how or with what. This was the hardest thing to wrap my head around. Please know that giving your baby expressed breastmilk counts as supplementing! If you produce enough either by pump or hand expression, you can use that to supplement. It doesn't have to be formula. However, if you aren't producing enough at the moment, formula exists. And formula isn't the devil. It will help to keep your baby alive and well. I'm planning to write a post about formula vs breastmilk later because there are MANY, many misunderstandings when it comes to formula.

There are many misconceptions about pumping. There is such a thing as "pump envy". I discovered this as I was struggling to pump an 20ml at each session. Seeing women who pump 8oz per session is enough to send a struggling pumper over the edge! I can't stress this enough to moms: It is average to pump 1-2oz combined during a pump session. Bodies respond differently to pumps. Some women respond very well to a pump. Those are the moms who are pumping bottles at a time! Others, like myself, need to pump multiple times per day to get enough for  bottles. If you're struggling with pumping, I'd encourage you to try and manual pump (I like the Medela Harmony) or hand expression. Many find that they can express double the amount with hand expression than with an electric pump.

Bottle feeding is OK. Yes, nipple confusion can happen. But babies are smart and can be taught to like both the breast and the bottle. If you do have to use a bottle, be sure to use the slow flow nipples. Find the "newborn" nipple, or even the "premature" nipple. When you flip the bottle over, it should barely drip, if at all. Also when feeding, use what is called "Paced Feeding." There is a great article on that here. My son never had an issue going back and forth between the two. In fact, I think having to supplement early on using a bottle made going back to to work easier because I was confident the sitter wouldn't have any issues feeding him.

The "Mom World" is tough. No mother, I repeat, NO MOTHER should ever be made to feel like they are failing their child. It is in our genes to care for these little screaming aliens that we birth and to do everything that we can for them. The Mom World is so incredibly judgmental and mean. I can't help but to feel embarrassed and ashamed by the thoughts passed on forums and the never ending Facebook groups about the cruelty and harm that comes from not breastfeeding your child, or letting them cry, or not putting them down, etc. I hate that I feel included simply because I am a mom. It doesn't matter how we care for our babies because we are still caring for our babies. At the end of the day, if they baby is fed and happy, you are a good mom.

Breastfeeding can be tough. No questions about it. Like my IBCLC told me, Never quit on a hard day. If it is something you want for your baby, you will make it work. It might take some blood, sweat, and tears, but you'll get there mama!



**I believe support is HUGE when it comes to breastfeeding. If you need a breastfeeding friend, feel free to let me know :D

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DIY Maternity Pillow

Hey Friends! I've moved this post to my new site! Click HERE to see my post on the DIY Maternity Pillow!

Enjoy!! Happy crafting :)

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5 Things Pregnancy Has Taught Me...So Far

Pregnancy has been nothing like what I imagined. To be honest, I really had no idea what to expect! As little girls, we most often dream of our weddings and being a mother or wife (if that's what you'd like). Well, I must have skipped dreaming about the getting to being a mother part.

You always hear one of two things when other moms talk about pregnancy: A) "I LOVED being pregnant", or B) "It was the worst thing I've ever gone through." I can't say my allegiance is strongly with one side or the other. I have my days of living in pregnancy bliss and then I have other days when I am absolutely miserable. I have a feeling this is normal though.

I'm a little over half way through now and learning more and more about myself, my baby, and my future life every day. Here are some of the lessons I've learned thus far, and what I can tell first time expecting moms!

It goes very fast. I cannot believe the 30 week mark is approaching, not to mention single digit weeks until Baby H is here! It seems like just yesterday that I was taking the test and now, it has taken over my life, in a good way of course! I do feel like I have been pregnant for a long time, but I might be a little sad when I am no longer. I do regret not taking more bump pictures along the way. Word of advice to the newly pregnant, take lots of pics! Oh, and because the time is so short, don't spend lots of money on maternity clothes. See if friends have some you can borrow or secondhand-it. No use in spending a crazy amount on an entirely separate wardrobe for such a short time!

There are a lot of rules. So. Many. Rules. Don't eat this, don't do that. I swear sometimes it feels like you're in preggo jail. The worst part is if you aren't up to date on the rules (heaven forbid!) and someone sees you committing a crime (i.e. eating a hot dog, gasp!) they will definitely give you the eye and pull the, "Are you really going to eat that? Do you know what that can do to your baby?" It is awful. Sometimes I feel like I am in high school again! I feel so self conscious when we go out to eat like I might choose something wrong. And most of the supporting information for these "rules" is contradictory. One place will tell you to eat a salad every day, then another will tell you leafy greens can't be trusted and are usually too high in Vitamin A anyway, so don't eat them. FOR THE LOVE! If you have a question, ask your doctor. If you are trusting them to deliver your baby, you can trust them to tell you what is and isn't safe. Don't check the internet, it will only terrify and confuse you.

All I want in life right now is a salami sandwich. You know what? I might just eat a salami sandwich if I want to. And no, that does not mean I am a bad Mom, it means I am human, oh, and pregnant.

Pregnancy brain is a real thing. Oh boy, is it a real thing. I have this one bad too. Before pregnancy, I felt so on top of my game. Now? Not so much! It is incredibly frustrating forgetting where you put things or commitments you have made. I was never good at writing things down, but now make myself or else there is no promising I'll remember! My husband and I have an agreement that he can't get upset with me for forgetting things or being indecisive while pregnant. He didn't understand that I really couldn't help it! While frustrating, it can also be comical...once the initial tears from embarrassment and frustration pass. You will be able to laugh about it later, I promise!

Pregnancy can make you your own worse nightmare. I struggle with worry and anxiety. Unfortunately, these traits mixed with pregnancy are a recipe for disaster. It is difficult, for me anyway, to not know exactly what is happening inside of me. I read into every little symptom that comes along. Because I like research, and knowing what is going on (say it with me, "Control Freak"), I'll usually try to find out what it means on my own. This never ends well...usually I'm speeding off to my doctor's office or calling them in tears. Its exhausting. I'm working really hard on staying positive and trusting my doctors when they tell me everything is just fine! I can't really help out with this area because I still haven't learned to control it myself!

Everyone's pregnancy is different. This is the most important thing I have learned and had to repeat over and over again to myself. I am blessed to be pregnant at the same time as a handful of my friends. It has been so much fun laughing, venting, and crying with each other as we go through this journey. However, it is hard not to compare your own journey to theirs. I remember someone asking me around 18 weeks if I had felt Baby kick yet because they started feeling it at 14 weeks. I hadn't, and I immediately thought something was wrong. Nothing was wrong, my pregnancy timeline was just different. My preggo support team had to help me through that one! This is also why googling symptoms doesn't work. A symptom can mean one thing for one mom but something totally different for another. Again, just ask your doctor. They know more about your situation than "Mama79472" on babycenter.com ;)


If you have anything to add, please do so in a comment! I love learning hearing other mommy-to-be stories!

<3
Me

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Here's to New Beginnings

It is 2015. That means it has been about 4 months since my last post.

When I was a kid, I couldn't keep a diary. I'd write maybe two or three entries then give it up. Seems my attempt to blog was met with the same outcome.

Since I last posted, my life has changed...completely.

I have a new job. I am working for a major insurance company as a Health Educator. It is a complete change from working in the clinical arena. There are positives and negatives about my new position, but I love that I'm expanding my professional experience. Very few 24 year olds have perfect jobs, or at least that's what I am told.

We've had financial problems. Our house, being older, decided to put us to the test as new homeowners. For a little while, it seemed that anything that could go wrong did, and it took some moolah to fix it. Also, the IRS decided that we owed some money, and by some I mean quite a bit. This was right before Christmas, which put a huge damper on the season, but we made it through and are working hard to build back some savings. We have been living a very minimalistic life, but I must say it has been a learning experience and, surprisingly, lots of fun for the hubby and me.

I got a fancy camera. I had been wanting one for a while for many reasons. The holiday season was coming up and I was hoping there would be some good Black Friday deals. BUT that's when the IRS thing happened, so that dream went out the window. Despite the hard times, my husband being the amazing man that he is, talked to some family members and they all came together to get me a Canon for Christmas. I cried. A lot. So now, I'm excited to post some better pictures on here!

And lastly, I'm pregnant!

The reveal photo around Christmas

Actually, I was pregnant the last time I posted back in October, we just didn't know it yet.

Baby H is doing great. We are over half way there, which is crazy! It is amazing how fast the time flies. I was very lucky and had a very easy first trimester, no sickness or anything of the sort. My eating habits haven't changed much, but I am loving peanut butter milkshakes and hating chicken. We do know the gender, but are keeping it a secret until our reveal party next month!

19 weeks, 6 days. Baby H has very long legs and big lips like Daddy!

You might have noticed I changed the look of my blog. If you didn't, that's ok. I am going in a new direction with what I'll be posting. Life has taught me a lot in the past six months and I have many thoughts about many things. I've had triumphs and defeats and I'd like to share and listen to what others have to say.

I'm looking forward to this new adventure and I hope you will journey with me.

Always,
Me

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